Our Night Talks
by Darkhymns
Summary: During a routine night watch, Lloyd and Colette find their meaningless conversations take a slightly different turn. [Lloyd/Colette]


Lloyd's eyes were on her for a long time.

He didn't mean them to be, but he and Colette were the only ones' awake out of their group, taking the night watch. As they were sitting on the grass, their backs to the dimming fire, watching the dark skies, his eyes would shift to her. She was as awake as he was, arms wrapped around her knees, very close beside him that their shoulders touched. He had said something inane, ("Why don't we ever try taking the Rheiards out to space? They'd fly high enough, wouldn't they?") and Colette had laughed, light-hearted and free, the sound so familiar of home that it tightened his chest.

"That would be fun! But didn't the Professor say we wouldn't be able to breathe out in space?"

Lloyd had, of course, completely forgotten that fact. "What, really?"

"Yeah! She gave us all a lecture about it and everything up in the tower."

Lloyd tried to find that piece of memory and came up with absolutely nothing. All he could recall was floating through the air as they reached the upper floors, and Zelos hitting his head when he had, well, swam too fast across the room.

He shrugged. "Must have been super boring."

Colette smiled, turning her gaze back to the sky. The Tower of Salvation was cloaked in shadows, making them both able to forget the urgency of their journey, at least for a little while. "Though I guess if we hold our breaths long enough, it would be fine. You could use your Rheiard and I could fly!"

Lloyd sat up straighter, excited at the prospect. "Yeah! Once the worlds are reunited, we should go do that!"

He had grasped her hand then. It had been right besides his own throughout their watch, the surface of his Exsphere brushing against her skin. He felt her warmth, his gloves discarded for the meantime, as well as her grip back. An easy action that he hadn't even thought about, yet when he looked at her more, he lost his train of thought. Words seemed to have escaped him, leaving him suddenly quiet.

She noticed it easily. "Lloyd, what's wrong?"

He knew at that moment what he was feeling, but the knowledge didn't make it any easier to admit. He shook his head. "It's nothing. Just spaced out."

He expected her to apologize for whatever reason and leave it at that. Instead she kept staring at him, worried.

"Are you sure? You just seemed really sad before."

He stumbled over his next words, feeling vastly uncomfortable over the trouble he was causing. "It- it's nothing. Really! I'm not sad or… anything…"

Colette shifted so that she was fully facing him, her knees now set on the grass. She took his other hand.

"You said I shouldn't keep anymore secrets from you, and that it's okay to tell you if anything was bothering me." She smiled gently, clasping their hands together. "So… I want you to know you can do the same with me! Just tell me if there's something you need."

Lloyd knew she meant it. Though she would listen to anything he said, as he would with her, what he wanted right now…he couldn't…

He gave her hands another squeeze before releasing them. "It's fine. I think I'm just tired or something." Then he smiled.

He should've known that wouldn't work. If anyone knew about fake smiles, it would be her.

She shifted a little closer to him, making him wary. "How about a deal then?"

Lloyd was lost. "Huh?"

Colette suddenly looked really determined, her eyes set on his. "We can play a game. If I win, you have to tell me what's bothering you. And if you win, um…" she looked around, as if hoping that whatever caught her gaze would help. It did, apparently, when her eyes rested on the cooking pot a few feet away near a snoring Genis, its metal now cool. "I'll make you a whole batch of hot chocolate! With extra marshmallows."

A nervous tinge went through his spine. Colette had never been this pushy about something before. He felt like he would be locked in a corner if he accepted. How could he tell her what was wrong, when… that wasn't really the right word for it even? It was just too embarrassing to wrap his head around, and maybe if he was firm about this, she would leave it alone.

But on the other hand, there was the possibility of some hot chocolate in the future. He liked chocolate!

"Okay, deal," he said. Her smile pulled his own as he shifted himself around so that both were facing each other, still seated on the ground. "What's the game?"

She held out her fist, thrusting it to the middle space between them. "Rock, paper, scissors!"

He was practically the king of rock, paper, scissors. He had this made.

"Okay! Better get those marshmallows ready then!"

With a grin, both lifted their right hands up in the air, ready to start. And just as when they were children, both started the chant at the exact right moment in excited whispers.

"Rock, paper, scissors and…shoot!"

Their hands faced each other across the battlefield. The choices; paper and paper.

They started over again. "And shoot!"

Paper and paper.

"And shoot!"

Paper and paper. Again.

"Colette, stop choosing paper!" Lloyd whined.

She laughed "I'm sorry. I'll pick something else!"

As they both lifted their hands once more, Lloyd decided on rock, knowing that Colette would change her own to scissors. She always did so whenever he told her to change her choice, thinking he would stick with paper.

So he was completely floored when he saw her open hand meet his fist, covering it over his in victory.

"Paper! I win!"

"Hey, you didn't change yours!"

"I know. I wanted to trick you!"

Lloyd sighed, his dreams of hot chocolate slowly fading out sight. "I'm supposed to be the tricky one here," he said, complaining over his fate.

"I can still make you some chocolate if you want." She straightened her back, leaning forward slightly. "But only if you tell me what's on your mind."

The unease inside his head came back. He looked at her carefully, pictured against the line of trees that was around them, her eyes bright and open. He swallowed, knowing how he would really like to just keep staring at her for a long time, to see her moving, talking, breathing.

Existing.

He fixed his gaze to his hands, curled up in his lap. "I can't…really."

He heard her make a sound, but he shook his head.

"It's just… dumb and embarrassing. I don't think I can even say it out loud."

He saw her hands reach for his own again. She gripped his right, opening his fist so that his fingers were placed gently in the open palm of her left.

"If you can't say it out loud, why don't you try writing it instead?"

The contact of her skin against his was warm and inviting. He liked it too much. Even if their hands became clammy after a while, even if the day became too hot, making him sweat, he still wanted to keep holding onto her. Even out in the cold, like in Flanoir, when their hands had been so numb, he wanted to work his stiff fingers around her own and keep them there. Because maybe this way-

He hadn't said anything for a while. She was still there, waiting for him.

Flicking a glance to her, noting how her hair fell over her shoulders, he took his fingers and wrote down what he knew. As he did so, he couldn't help but try to see past her sleeve, to see if there was any hint at all of those patches of crystal she had hidden away. No, they cured it now. She was fine. For now. Always only 'for now.'

He kept his fingers in her hand, long after he was done writing. She was staring down as well, translating what he said.

 _I missed this._

She raised her head. "Lloyd?"

He wished he could crawl under a rock, but he stayed seated before her, keeping the sensation of her hand against his, selfishly. "Told you it was dumb," he joked, but his voice had caught on something. He cleared his throat, breaking the stillness around them.

She didn't say anything else. The silence stretched on, her waiting on what he would say next. And he had to follow through, because what he had admitted to her suddenly called for more. He couldn't leave it at that.

"I like it when we can just mess around like this, just… just us." The talks, the stupid games they'd play, the star-watching. "So when you're gone, it feels really empty. If it weren't for everyone else, I'm not sure what I'd-" he stopped, too afraid to think on that. "I just don't want you to leave again."

Her fingers curled around his own. "I'm here now though."

Now.

That wasn't enough.

 _But I want you always here._ He gripped both of his hands against her's tight. _Sometimes I just want this to be over and go back home with you._ But such thoughts were hard for him to say, even though he opened his mouth, even though he moved closer for her to hear. Instead he found himself kissing her cheek. Her skin was soft against his mouth, and he felt her shiver at his touch.

Once he realized what he'd done, he pulled away.

"I, uh…" he started, but Colette seemed to have gone closer to him, making up for the space he had abandoned. She breathed softly, gazing up at him. Just having her so close made his lungs feel ready to burst.

Their lips barely touched, the slight contact sending waves of excitement through him. He kept his eyes open, watching how she closed hers, her head tilted to better fit against him. Her lips were warm compared to his, which he felt was dry and parched with thirst. But she pressed against him, and he let out a small breath, letting one hand wander to touch her neck.

It could hardly be called a kiss. Their lips didn't move, and they kept themselves from sinking into the sensation fully, held back by inexperience and nervousness. But when they separated, it was only by a half an inch or so, easy enough to capture the other again if they wanted.

His fingers moved through her hair. She leaned against his hand.

"I don't want to leave you either," she said.

He wanted to tell her that he loved her. That he had loved her before Tethe'alla, before the angels, before all of this had ever started. But he didn't get the chance to.

"Hey there, hunnies."

That voice was like a ball of lead settling into his stomach. Both Lloyd and Colette jerked back from each other, turning back to the camp to find Zelos standing several feet away, his grin nearly as wide as his face.

"Wh- what are you-! Just-!... WHAT?!"

"Relax there, Bud! Man, and you were being so smooth a second ago, too."

The thought that Zelos had been watching them suddenly made him very nauseous. Colette didn't look so pleased either.

"But, um…!" She stumbled, bringing her hands to her chest, unsure what to do with them now that they were no longer linked with Lloyd's. "I should've heard…! I mean, I'm sorry, my angel hearing should've been able to…"

"That's what love does to ya, sweetie." Zelos shook his head in mock exasperation. "It clouds the senses, makes you consider the impossible, lifts both of your spirits until you finally reach that glorious clim-"

"Why are you awake, Zelos!?" Lloyd interrupted. He wasn't entirely sure where the guy had been going with his words, but he assumed it wasn't anything good.

Zelos, to his annoyance, just shrugged. "Eh. Insomnia, lately. Luckily I had you guys to keep me entertained."

Lloyd clenched his fists, his legs poised to stand so that he could smack him across the face. "You sick-!"

"Anyway, here," Zelos said, moving forward to kneel on the grass.

Lloyd's muscles quickly relaxed when he saw what Zelos was holding. Two large mugs that he had somehow completely missed before, their surfaces a little dented from the journey. Reflexively, he reached out to take one cup, while Colette grabbed the other. She looked down at the contents, raising her eyes afterwards.

"You made us coffee?"

"Yeah. Just a little fire spell and some ground beans, and then I had some nice caffeine to keep me up. But I made too much, and I figured you guys didn't wanna sleep just yet."

Lloyd wasn't entirely sure what to feel. Grateful? Pleasantly surprised? It seemed like a peace offering more than anything else, which he didn't mind. Then he narrowed his eyes at the drink.

"This isn't drugged, is it?"

Zelos gave an exaggerated gasp. "Why, no! How could you think I'd do something so underhanded?"

"Probably because it wouldn't be the first time."

"…Alright, point taken. But you trust me, don't you?"

Lloyd nodded. "Yeah, I do." Then resumed his silence, staring.

Zelos sighed. "It's not drugged."

Taking that as a sign that the drink wasn't to be feared, Colette took a small sip, blowing on the liquid first. Her hands held gingerly to the hot cup as she drank. "Wow! It's really good!" She gazed at Zelos with bright eyes. "Did you add vanilla to this?"

"Well, I don't really like the strong type. I do have some delicate sensibilities."

Lloyd wasn't really paying attention anymore, already downing half his cup. "Hey, yeah, it _is_ pretty good!"

Zelos' lips twisted slightly. "Come on, can't be so surprising that I can make a good cup of joe, is it?"

Colette tilted her head. "Kinda."

"Yeah," Lloyd agreed.

"Way to give me a backhanded compliment, you guys." Zelos stretched his arms. "Sooo… you forgive me for spying a little now?"

Lloyd frowned again. While he was sure that some people would say he was justified in giving Zelos a good whack (say, Sheena) he decided to just forget it. Besides, he was still a little shaky from before. Sneaking a quick glance to Colette, who smiled at him sweetly, he figured he wasn't the only one.

"I'll forgive you more if you give us some space," he answered Zelos.

The Chosen held up his hands in surrender. "Alright, no problem. It's no fun being the third wheel anyway." He stuck his hands in his pockets, and spoke with uncharacteristic gentleness. "You kids are pretty cute together."

Lloyd gripped his coffee mug, feeling his face heat in embarrassment. Colette, seated beside him, giggled shakily. "Thank you," she said.

Zelos gave a fierce grin. "Just holler if you want some more of my amazing coffee. I mean, it's not hot chocolate, but it's better than nothing, right?"

Lloyd blinked. _Just how long was he watching us?_ But he decided to take the high road, to magnanimously ignore those implications. Especially since Zelos didn't seem to hound on both of them so much right now.

"Thanks," he said, feeling an ounce of respect for Zelos who was treating this important moment between him and Colette a little better than what most would have expected.

"Oh, and don't forget that you love birds gotta list out all the details for me later!"

…And then all that respect suddenly evaporated.

"Will you get out of here?!"

With a little yelp after seeing Lloyd half stand up, Zelos rushed back to the campsite. He was amazingly quiet on his feet to not wake the rest of their group that stayed asleep in their packs. Seeing him a sufficient distance away, Lloyd sat back down.

"Did you still wanna talk more?" Colette asked him, placing her coffee mug in her lap.

In all honesty, Lloyd wanted to kiss her again, to make it more real this time and commit the feeling of her to memory. But… it was probably best if he did that when he was way more sure that they were alone.

"Yeah," he said, reaching for her hand.

* * *

Zelos wouldn't be getting any sleep tonight, that's for sure. The air was too cold and his blanket was torn, leaving him to suffer the elements. Trading with Sheena, or suggesting other means to keep warm, hadn't helped him change the situation. His stomach was still way too sore from that fist of hers.

Laying back on his mangled pack, he turned back to the other side of camp, seeing Lloyd and Colette still awake, seated near each other, the whisper of their laughter trailing back to him.

And, for some reason, it made him happy. This dumb kid that still trusted him after all the crap he pulled, and the Chosen who understood more than anyone, resting in each other' warmth. Which they always had before, but at least they knew just why now.

"Heh." Zelos turned his head to the skies, deciding to count the stars to pass the time. "They really are some cute kids."


End file.
